Building Better Relationships

Relationships play an integral role in our lives, whether business oriented, familial based or friendship related. Building healthy relationships are important. In every type of relationship, there is an aspect of influence present, where one or more persons has an influential role on the other. This is a good thing as it connects and unites the different individuals together. Leadership is rooted on this same principle of influence.

It is important to understand that not every relationship will last for a lifetime. Some relationships are only for a season. Nonetheless, if your desire is to learn how to improve your relationship skills, I think I can help.  Maybe you have a new person/employee joining your team at work; maybe you are seeking to build a better connection with your child or maybe you are just seeking to become a better friend, here are some things to consider:

1.     Building relationships takes time-

The reason why building relationships takes time is because trust and confidence must first be built. John Maxwell in his book, How To Influence People, penned that “Integrity is what allows others to trust you. And without trust you have nothing. Trust is the most important factor in personal and professional relationships. It is the glue that holds people together.”

Think of it this way, you won’t go up to a random stranger and tell them all of your dreams or all of what happened to you in your past. (Well at least I don’t think you would). Why? Because, that would seem awkward and you didn’t build trust, confidence or a connection with that person prior to that moment.

So the next time you are trying to build a relationship whether personally or professionally, don’t stress if in the initial stages it seems a little difficult. As that person observes that you can be trusted and as they see that you are a person of integrity, I am confident that the relationship will grow.

2.     Building relationships takes nurture

Nurture is one of the key components to building better relationships. Similar to a plant which you desire to see grow, relationships also require nurture. Here are some practical ways you can nurture your relationships:

·      Commit to helping the other person

·      Lift them to higher levels by helping them reach their potential

·      Believe in them

· Encourage and empower them

·  Let them know how much you appreciate them and their efforts

·     Be accessible to them

·     Listen to them

·     Respect them

3.     Building relationships takes intentional action

Just like any other area of your life where you desire to succeed in, relationships do not only take time and nurture, but they also require intentional effort. In order to build healthy and better relationships, you must choose on a regular basis to sow those seeds which were mentioned above. You will never get a harvest of something if you never sowed it. Therefore, if you want better relationships, take some time from your schedule to invest in and to show a genuine interest in the other person.

Persons often appreciate when they feel heard, valued and recognised. In the work place, if employees don’t feel recognised for their efforts or if they don’t feel heard, it can impact on their overall performance. In the home, if children feel ignored by parents or spouses feel unnoticed by each other, emotional pain and rejection can often be the result. In the church, if the needs of members or youth are not addressed, then persons may leave that place of worship. Therefore, all types of relationships require intentional action in order to be improved.

These three points are important to remember when seeking to build relationships. As leaders and influencers in our own unique ways, building healthy relationships is necessary.